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4
Key moves for a great
first date from Match.com
Few things
in life can be as intimidating as a first date — especially when going
in blindly, with only a few exchanged emails or telephone calls. Without
a little careful planning, the tension of a first meeting can cause a
potentially compatible couple to spontaneously combust in twenty minutes
or less.
Think about it. You’d never enter a job interview without a little
preparation and attention to detail. Why should love be any different?
You can’t just wing it, or you’re doomed to fail. Strategy counts on
love’s battlefield, too. So pay careful attention to these four basic
first-date moves, and the first introduction could lead to love.
1. Make your approach.
Swap at least a couple photos before making plans to meet. Because
you’ve got plenty of stress ahead for the evening, why worry about
approaching the wrong person or missing your date entirely? It’s
no shock that most people choose their best shot for a profile and
may look slightly different offline. Be prepared for two problems
that may arise: Mistaken preliminary attraction and many awkward
moments spent scanning the faces of complete strangers. Before you
go, make sure you know your date’s true identity. Give details on
how to find each other, reveal your clothing plans, top your duds
with a bright tie or scarf.
2. Talk to me.
You’ve set aside time to spend with a relative stranger, so how do
you plan to spend it? Talk! Regardless of whether or not the
attraction translates from online to off, be friendly, be attentive
and be inquisitive. Arm yourself with tons of questions about
career, hobbies, family and interests. When your date reciprocates
with a query of his or her own, go out of your way to avoid one-word
responses. Don’t be shy; don’t hold back. You’re there to
learn about one another, so open up and start talking.
3. Get down to business.
If you’re the type to typically clam up in the face of potential
love, I highly suggest you partake in what I dub the “distraction
date.” At all costs, avoid dinner and drinks. Stay away from
coffee shops, and go nowhere near a quiet park. Save these venues
for later dates when you’ve regained your talent for talk.
Instead, try something sporty like miniature or Frisbee golf,
batting cages or bicycling. If not a jock, try a course in dancing,
pottery painting or a trip to the museum. Keep busy, and your date
will never know you’re at a loss for words.
4. Focus on the finale.
The parting moment can be nearly as perplexing as the initial
meeting. So many thoughts are bound to overwhelm: Is my date
attracted? Did I ramble on too much about work? Was my comment about
current events completely asinine? Push these worries aside for the
moment and simply relax while saying goodbye. Because more than
likely, your date’s got a few self-imposed bothersome thoughts
too. If all went well and no blood was shed, express your interest
and be genuine about future intentions. I’d opt to avoid the
first-date kiss. Instead, if the vibe’s right, go for a quick hug.
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